The Cheney Cabal Is Holding Ed Neumeier Hostage

Now, the Confidence Man either forget about or simply never heard this particular rumor:

"After Sept. 11, U.S. government officials reportedly sought out sundry Hollywood screenwriters to help them brainstorm potential terrorist scenarios."

But this would make a lot of sense.

The Confidence Man for the last 30 months or so has been convinced that Kreepy Unka Dick has Ed Neumeier tied to a chair somewhere in a small room in the Secure Undisclosed Location, with electrodes tapping into poor Ed's cerebellum.

"I for one find the concept of a bug that thinks to be offensive!"