June 30, 2004

The Purloined Liver


Ah, our literalistic public servants! But notice that CNN itself is evasive: it doesn't confess to understanding the "let speeders accelerate to an early death so we can get their organs" subtext of the sign, but it doesn't back up the folks who obviously don't get it, either. Ignorance of ignorance is bliss.

June 09, 2004


Well, this is certainly over-priced. Very strange choice to advertise this item on CL rather than eBay ...


What would Jibbenainosay estimate as a reasonable asking price for this?

Like Nosferatu's Coffin

Hm. The AP is having some inadvertent fun with the inappropriate use of active verbs:

Reagan's Body Begins Trip to Washington

June 04, 2004

The Political Invisible

The Confidence Man was recently enjoying an evening of televisual entertainment courtesy of one of the slithering tentacles of Rupert Murdoch's Hydra, and he happened to see a promotional message for an upcoming dramatic series by the name of "North Shore," with an appropriately and attractively tawdry logline. Apparently, it's a poor-boy-meets-privileged-girl teen soaper, along the lines of "The O.C."

What really struck The Confidence Man about the promo, however, was the ad's VO tagline crescendo. It started off with "They were from different worlds ..." over a montage of teen hotties surfing and, as the kids say, "getting it on," and then built to a penultimate VO tagline of "They came from different classes ..." again over the continued Gidget-Does-"Dallas" montage.

Now: we all know that the dramatic phrase "they came from different worlds," outside the realm of scifi, means specifically that the romantic couple under consideration come from different class backgrounds.

So: The Confidence Man is confused. Why take the extra step of actually referring to class immediately thereafter? What, then, would/could the "different worlds" mean in this syntactic structure?

Now That's What I Call a Superfund Site

This article entirely misses the point.

These officials were doubtless guided by true believers at the newly faith-based EPA, trying to ensure that Virgina's waterways remain sin-free and unsullied. Imagine -- children could have been supping downstream from that tainted shore!

June 03, 2004

The Swagger and Demented Logic of the Fanatic

Jesus. Who the fuck writes this shit?

Where There's Smoke ...

This etymological account strikes The Confidence Man as being a bit too whimsical to be true ...

[...] the term buccaneer, a 17th century adventurer or sea
robber, comes from the technique, called "boucan"
[meaning barbecue], of curing meat by smoking it
slowly over a fire, its French practitioners being
called "boucaniers."

It's Black Republican Season!

Fortunately, one doesn't need a license (in most states) to reap Black Republicans ...


... or, The Confidence Man channels Donald Segretti ...

So: the Cheney Cabal is enlisting Christian congregation leaders to coordinate a get-out-the-vote effort in November -- thereby potentially putting the churches' tax-free status at risk.

Given the GOP's long and grotesque history of vote-suppression among Dem minority demographics (including, of course, the Florida faux-felon-purge in '00 and the South Dakota Native American vote-suppression in the '02 mid-terms), The Confidence Man is taken of an inspiration.

We need to initiate a program to convince evangelicals that, if they have been politically rousted by their pastor, that they are ineligible to vote. This could consist, at the outset, of an urban-legend-type trope circulated mostly verbally but also via email. Second stage could consist of crude, implausible forgeries of "official" documents "attesting" to the "truth" of the rumor. Finally, individuals in vaguely international uniforms could position themselves near by polling places on voting day (and churches two days previously) "advising" the fundies of the "limitations."